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Monthly Archives: January 2014

Feeling Overwhelmed

Here it is.  The month of February.  Can it be over already?  Pretty please?  I am up to my ears in planning and preparation for several different things, three of which are all next week!

Wednesday is Alex’s and Robert’s Valentines Day parties at school.  As the K3 homeroom mom, I am in charge of planning and organizing the party for the 3 year olds. This includes planning and providing materials for a craft and making sure there is enough food for everyone.

Friday morning is Robert’s pre-op appointment filled with blood draws and X-rays and talks with surgeons, nurses, and anesthesiologists. That will be stressful all by itself.

Then Saturday is Alex’s 4th birthday party.  We were supposed to have a bounce house outside but with a forecast of 90% chance of rain, I have to come up with some fun indoor activities!  And I am not in the least bit creative, so I am frantically browsing the internet trying to figure out realistic ideas that I can pull off with only a week left to go (and I have to figure out when I’m going to go shopping for this party).

The second week of February, we will hardly see my husband at all as he has several after work commitments to keep. We won’t see him at all the second weekend of the month.

The 17th is a school day and Alex’s actual birthday, and of course, the 18th is Robert’s surgery.  I guess it’s a good thing I don’t have any time to panic about the surgery.  I have to get through this next week first.

Oh, and to top everything off, I figured I’d be a good citizen and renew my drivers’ license a month and a half early and I would do it online because, you know, I have three young boys I have to take with me everywhere I go.  Turns out my new license will be mailed to my old address even though I was required to give my current information (including address) when I was signing up for a new license.  And no one will return my calls or even answer my emails so I can figure out what to do about this situation.  It would have been better for me to take my 3 boys to the DMV office, sit for 2 hours, and finally have a new license in hand rather than deal with this.

Long story short, I need prayers.  And I guess I need to do some praying of my own. 1Peter 5:7 is Alex’s latest memory verse, and I suppose it applies to all of this. “Cast your cares on Him, for He cares for you.” These things I’m stressing about don’t really matter in the long run.  But it sure is nice writing it out and getting it all off my chest.


How are YOU doing?

I’ve gotten that question a lot since finding out about Robert’s upcoming surgery.  After the initial shock wore off, I find I’ve felt peaceful for the most part.  Ultimately I just want this surgery done and over with so we can get back to normal life.  I have had moments of fear and worry but overall I have been fine.  I know Robert will be okay.  But today I was thinking about how worried I was leading up to his first surgery.  I was sick to my stomach the day of the surgery.  I was scared.  So very scared.  And nothing bad happened.  In fact, everything good that could have happened did happen.  The surgery was better than we had hoped for and Robert left the hospital five days later.  Within a month, he could walk a mile by himself, he was eating better, and he had tons more energy.  I started to wonder, what if my lack of worry means that something bad will happen this time?  I started to worry about not worrying.  How sinful and untrusting I am!  There is no point in worrying about anything because God already has it all taken care of.  He knows what the outcome will be.  And He has promised to take care of His people.  So now I will try to remember and put into practice His command to “… not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about it itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6:34)

Here we go again

Almost exactly three years after his first open heart surgery, Robert is getting ready for another. This time his aortic valve will be replaced with one that will hopefully last a bit longer. I’m not ready for this. I cannot let my fear consume me but I cannot ignore it either. But what I can do is trust. Trust that God has Robert in His hands. Trust that God knows what is best for my son. Trust that God works everything together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. And trust that God can do infinitely more than I can ever ask or imagine.