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Why Him?

My mother-in-law asked me last week if knowing Robert has a heart condition makes it more difficult to discipline him. My honest answer was no. Thankfully, Robert’s heart problem is not part of our every day lives, with the exception of the one medication he takes twice a day. And he’s been taking meds his entire life so it’s not like that one medication is an inconvenience. It’s normal for us. Robert is healthy. He is active. He eats more than I do. (Well, more than I did before this tiniest one invaded my personal space.) He is just fine. And we are so grateful for that. We realize that things could be so much worse than they are. He could have lung problems. He could have been that poor 9 month baby awaiting a heart transplant I met in the hospital after Robert’s last surgery. One thing I have learned through all of this is that there is always someone worse off than “you.” And that’s humbling. I’ve hurt for my son and I have wondered why he was born with heart disease. After all, neither Christopher nor I have any history of it in our families. But I’ve never really cried out to God “Why Me? Why our son?” Because, why not?

(written July 11, 2014 and I thought it worth publishing)

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